


Scissors

by GutsyGumshoe



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Depression, M/M, Self-Harm, karkats only mentioned, this is a vent fic and is kinda graphic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-23
Updated: 2016-02-23
Packaged: 2018-05-22 17:28:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6088293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GutsyGumshoe/pseuds/GutsyGumshoe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave isn't feeling too good.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scissors

Dave slid down the wall, breathing heavy, his hands trembling as he steadied himself on the floor. Weak, that’s what he was, it's all his fault, Karkat was mad at him, he’d found his most recent injuries after Dave promised not to do it again, and here he was, on the cold tile floor of the bathroom, scissors in hand.

He felt tears slide down his cheeks, shades tossed across the room in his desperation **.** He couldn't bring himself to look at his reflection, see the mess he really was, walls down and core exposed for the world to see. Of course no one ever saw this, no one except Karkat when he found him, fuck, he hoped Karkat wouldn't come looking for him, not again, the look on his face last time was too much to bear.

_You're such a disappointment, how would he feel about this? Disgusted._

No, he couldn't think of Karkat right now.

“Dave please don't do this, there are other ways” Karkat's voice echoed in his mind.

_Do it already_

No. He _needed_ this, he did, it was the only thing that could help, if only for a little while.

It had started small, a fist clenched too tight, blunt nails digging into his arm, teeth crushing his knuckles in a desperate attempt to calm down, then, a dull blade from a pair of scissors, just sharp enough to draw blood if he used a decent amount of pressure

It was only a few months ago he had actually started leaving marks, when he realised that it wasn't normal, and he still did it anyways. This was something he had scoffed at in the past, something he’d thought was ridiculous, how could this ever be considered helpful? Why cause more pain? Why would someone do that? He’d had no idea.

Dave looked at his arm, littered with marks, new and old, you could still see the scars from the first time he’d caused any real damage, it was in the summer, he’d had to wear too many bracelets to cover it up, no one noticed.

_No one cares enough to notice, you deserve it anyway, they know that._

The scissors glinted in the sickly yellow of the bathroom light, they were innocuous, stereotypical razor blades seemed like a terrible idea to him, just asking to get found out.

_So are the countless marks against your arm, attention seeking bitch._

He brought the broken scissors to his arm, pressing against the pale skin, dragging it, tearing the skin only a little.

_It's not enough_.

Again, and again, marking his arm from wrist to elbow, some barely scratching, others leaving red marks he knew would be scabbing over. He almost never drew blood, he couldn't stand the sight of it, the smell too, it wasn't worth it. His arm felt raw all around, it felt good, the throbbing and stinging in his limb distracted him, it calmed his mind. He could focus on the pain he caused, he was in control. He could breathe again.

**Author's Note:**

> this is a vent fic, and is heavily based off my own experience with self harm.  
> currently working on a second chapter, karkat will actually be in this one!  
> edit: sorry for the wait! chapter two will be coming soon, im just swamped with exam stuff, and writing is hard, but im working on it so dont worry!  
> (this was intended to be a oneshot tho oops)


End file.
